Breakfast with Jesus

Chapter 21 of the Gospel of John, begins with Peter telling the five other apostles who are gathered with him at the Sea of Tiberias, “I am going fishing,” and they all respond by saying,” We also will come with you.” After fishing all night long and catching nothing, Jesus appears on the shore at dawn and tells them to,”Cast the net over the right side of the boat and you will find something.” The apostles oblige, but are not able to pull in the net because of the large number of fish that fill it. Taking note of this miraculous catch, the apostle John says to Peter, “It is the Lord,” - - which motivates Peter to jump into the sea and swim to the shore to see Jesus. Meanwhile, the rest of the apostles drag the net of 153 fish with them by boat to the shore.

Upon arrival to the shore, the apostles see a charcoal fire with fish cooking on it, and Jesus says to them, “Bring some of the fish you just caught,” and, ”Come have breakfast.” The apostles, join Jesus for breakfast though they don’t seem to fully recognize him. He then takes the bread and fish and gives it to them to eat.
“When they have finished breakfast, Jesus said to Simon Peter, Simon son of John, do you love me more than these? He said to him, Yes Lord; you know that I love you. Jesus said to him, Feed my lambs.” Jesus questions Peter two more times about his love for him, to which Jesus replies, “Tend my sheep” and “Feed my lambs.”

Initial Insight
I’ve always enjoyed reflecting on John 21 because I love to imagine having breakfast with Jesus at a morning campfire on the beach. It is a welcoming, fun image for me of hanging out with Christ in nature. It’s the way I enjoy being in fellowship with other men and having this carefree time with Jesus is something that feels welcoming, comforting and collegial to me.
I must confess, however, that as I enter into this scripture meditation that I already have a relationship with the text. Besides liking the image of having a morning beachfront breakfast with Jesus, the dialogue that Jesus has with Peter after breakfast is something I’ve actually heard whispered in my ears. Specifically, during a time of evening prayer in an empty St. Clement Church, I was reflecting on the call of some of the great prophets in scripture (e.g. Moses, Gideon, David, Jonah, and Paul) and I got on my knees and asked the Lord, “So what do you want ME to do?,” and I heard the words, “Feed my lambs, Tend my sheep.” This was a startling insight, and has been a clue to me that the Lord is calling me to serve in some kind of ministry but I’m still discerning how to live out that call.

New Insight
In the scripture story, Jesus reveals himself to his disciples again. In perspective, Jesus has already appeared to them at least four times prior to this event in the Gospel of John. (e.g. Mary Magdeline at the tomb when she mistakes him for the gardener, the two men leaving Jerusalem for Emmaus, the ten apostles hiding out in the upper room, and week later to the same group - - plus Thomas who was not present previously and asks to put his hands inside Jesus’ wounds). What this chronology tells me is that the apostles don’t get it. They don’t yet “get” the resurrection. This is a startling insight that hadn’t struck me before, especially since Thomas, for instance, has just had physical contact with the wounds of Jesus and proclaims, “My Lord and My God!”

Abundance = Jesus
Another thing that strikes me about the scripture is that there are so many fish in the net that the apostles cannot empty the net into the boat, so they drag the net of fish to shore, yet the net does not break. Like the feeding of the 5000 and similar miracles, this miracle stirs John’s heart (and possibly the other apostles’ hearts) to realize, “It is the Lord.” They can’t see Christ with their eyes, but they see him with their hearts. Abundance is Jesus’ calling card. “It’s the Lord.”
I once heard and evangelical preacher say, “When Christ shows up, Christ shows off,” and I’ve experienced this first hand in my life when abundant blessings (experiences, finances) show up that are bigger that I was expecting or imagined. So these abundant encounters with Christ stir our hearts to make us realize (like the abundance of fish) “It’s the Lord” - - meaning I didn’t do this so the Lord must have, and “Wow” what a blessing it is!

The scripture also shows me that because the abundance of fish the apostles encounter is so great they have to “drag” the net to shore. I think this is true of blessings I’ve received also. My heart is used to a diet of three square meals a day of soup, sandwiches, and salad - - but the minute someone wants to offer me lobster (e.g. all you can eat lobster) - - by first reaction is one of wow and wonder rather than, “Let’s eat.” My heart wants to soak in this blessing and make sense of it first. I can’t digest all of it at once because Christ’s abundant blessing is much bigger than my small hardened heart. And I think Jesus shows us/me in the scripture that he knows this miraculous blessing will “wow” us, so he helps us unpack it. “Bring some of the fish you just caught.” “Let me help you unpack that. Let me help you enjoy this blessing I want to give you. This is what I am about. I want to bless you with abundance. Let me help you.”

Jump in With Both Feet
The scripture tells us that Peter “jumped into the sea” upon hearing “It is the Lord.” Peter is the excitable apostle it seems who always wants to walk on the water with Jesus, be bathed entirely by Jesus on Holy Thursday, and wields his sword when Jesus is betrayed by Judas in the garden. I see myself in Peter in this reading in many ways, but what I see Jesus trying to uncover in his questioning of Peter is, “What’s underneath you enthusiasm for me and my ministry? You just returned to fishing a few hours ago, and the six other apostles followed you. You have been with me three years, and I know you are my friend, but do you love me? Are you willing and prepared to follow me? Do you love me more than these? Do you love me more than fishing? Do you love me enough to give up your old way of life and suffer and die for me? Those are big questions.

The stakes in the conversation are elevated by the fact that this is the first recorded time Peter has spoken to Jesus since he denied him three times. So in a sense Jesus is saying in a back-handed way, “I already forgive you for denying me,Peter. So don’t worry about it. What I really want to know is if you love me so that I know where our relationship stands in the future. Can I trust you? Can I rely on you? I’ve got big plans, and I think you’re the man for the job, but I need to know if you’re up for this.”

In my own life, believe it or not, I’ve been practicing for this conversation with Jesus. To overcome some of the past fears in my life I regularly spend time praying and meditating by the north branch of the Chicago River. It’s a beautiful and peaceful place. As part of my meditation, I step into the river with both feet (with my shoes on) and tell the Lord I’m ready for whatever he is calling me to do. I ask him just to shepherd me and reveal the path to me so that I can participate in his Kingdom. It has been a helpful ritual for my spiritual growth and to practice saying “Yes, Lord you know that I love you.”

A Short Course in Love
In summary, as I’m learning, I think John 21 is a short training course on Christ’s love for us. In the first phase, call it Love 1.0, Jesus shows us the abundant life he wants to bless us with as his Beloved (i.e. an overflowing net of fish). It the second phase, call it Love 2.0, Christ calls us to participate in his Kingdom and be his reflection of love in the world. Yes, he wants us to praise him, but he also wants us to participate with him and be his hands and feet - - with feet that jump out of the fishing boat in a spirit of excitement and commitment that challenges us to give up our old way of life (i.e. fishing), and with hands that aren’t afraid to heal the sick or be stretched across the cross to suffer in his name.